I'm missing someone who is 4 hours time differ from my country.
*hoping you feel the same*


♥ ◕‿ ◕☆

double faces, thick faces, ugly faces, no face people, but YOU??

Imagine that you had a friend whom you thought that would last. That you thought that he would keep his words and meant what he said the time he said it so wonderfully. 


And now, look, he is hiding from you, what the heck man?
Am I gonna eat you alive or something? Jesus Christ!! You seems to be the first that I felt a friend that is so fake. 
I can put it in a sense how horrible a friend you are. 
I met all kinds of double faces, thick faces, ugly faces, no face people, but YOU?? I don even know how to distinguish. 


The word that I'm gonna give you is FAKE. 
Guess what? Since you already decided, I'll do you a favor in return fake friend. Oh.. should I even categorize you as a friend? No..  
I'll stay away from your life as a favor, and catching up with each others life is no longer needed, cause you break the bond of friendship.

Sorry that I love you

對不起,我愛過妳

曾經我總是試著討妳歡心
好讓妳認為我就是真命天子
那麼我就能贏得妳的愛

送妳鮮花牽妳的手
沒有人阻止我們
但是愛情終究讓我們盲目

對不起我傷害了妳
對不起我搞砸了
對不起我愛上了妳
很抱歉它發生了 但道歉也不能讓時光倒流
所有我對妳做的事
我希望可以補償
對不起我曾經那樣愛妳
對不起我曾經那麼地需要妳
對不起我曾緊緊擁著妳

而且我還要道歉的是
讓妳愛上我卻必須說再見
還有 我居然教會了妳 什麼是哭泣
愛情真的來過 但它又悄悄溜走

很抱歉我曾給妳夢想的一切
卻又在我逃離後全部拿走
抱歉 我的愛 因為我浪費了妳的青春


經過了這麼久
一句抱歉並不能改變什麼
但我真心希望 這句抱歉能打開妳的心房
好讓妳在未來還能繼續去愛

the angel that you will love

Don't know how long ago, its been a while since,
you told me your favorite story
it's been on my mind, driving me crazy
am I the reason that you're crying now


I see the tears in your eyes, they tell you don't believe
that I can't be, your prince charming
Maybe you can't understand, but when you said you love me
my life was changed, and I wish you could see
I'm willing to, be the one, and the angel that you will love
with open arms, I'll always be there
you must believe that you and me, will end up happily 
in our own fairy tale story


I will be, be the one, and the angel that you will love
with open arms, I'll always be there. 

you must believe that you and me, will end up happily 

in our fairy tale story

shut up vivian

I don't know whether you notice 
but I just kinda don't wanna say
cause I feel like who am I anyway
or why should I be concern


Talking you has become my habit
staying up late is all I can do
I don't mind any of that
Cause I enjoy it


You still have her pictures around
my mind is not at ease
gloomy, feeling uneasy
and I still tell myself who am I to care


So, shut up vivian
that's none of your business
back off!!
now, go to sleep. 
your dreams is waiting for you. 




*lay dead, and shut my mind*

A letter from beloved Mum and Dad

As I said, I hate you and love you at the same time
for I will never leave you, nor stop taking care of you,
for you always has been there for me when I needed you.

You Annoys me

Dear Parents,


You annoys me sometimes
you make the path for me
you force me to do things
you're angry at me for not listening


I hated you sometimes
I feel like i can't bare with you anymore
I'm sick and tired of all these crap
I wanna leave to a place where is far from you


you make me hated you
for all I know you are just being a parents
who love me so much
who don't wish that I get hurt
who help me up when i falls
who teach  me and guided me the right way
who kiss me tenderly
who bare with me even though I'm stupid
who care for my every needs
who goes out of the limit of love
who can let me climb over your head
who tease me when I'm angry
who make me my favorite foods
who spoil me as much as you wanted
who fight for my right
who gets into trouble just to protect me
who teach me driving even though I'm a reckless driver
who make me look look even though i look bad
who gives me confidence
who loves me more that I love myself
who makes me write all of these good things about you
I hate you at the same time I love you
Why are you so mean to me?
I wanna be far away from you at the same time be close to you
I am damaged for being I'm you greatness of love. 


I still have to say thank you. 

If I must say

If only there is such a thing call fairytale,
If only pain is not as painful as it was,
If only people just be honest,
There won't be so much mess.

If only we could stop time,
If only we can see through hearts,
If only no one to blame on,
There won't be so much suffering.

If only I didn't know you,
If only I didn't meet you,
If only I didn't fall for you,
There won't be so much confusion.

If only there's no "If"
I won't be so miserable.

因为你真的很不可爱

你可以很好， 也可以很坏
我可以很可爱， 但不能让你心暖
你不可以让一让我吗？
宠爱我一下不能吗？

我只是爱和你撒娇，
我只是爱和你微笑，
我只是爱被你抱，
难道你不知道？

你不能明白我吗？
你不能看看我的心吗？
你不能不要那么凶猛吗？
因为你真的很不可爱。
很难被爱，
很难要爱，
很难疼爱，

我宁肯不要被爱。

Pandas

Pandas still the cutest animal of all.. I don't know why they gives me the feeling of warmness and lovable.


There's one thing that I have in common with the pandas is that I have black eyes too.. XD

Eagerness

I'm really thankful, this towns' busy runway

it gives us the chance to relate for even a short period of time

the large crowds levels down the chances of holding your hand

if only I don't learn to let go, I won't let go

I can't stand the eagerness of loving you

loneliness confuse me having you on my own

the happiness you gave me works in my mind all day

mend all my wounds

I can't stand the eagerness of kissing you

unsure of my movements touched by you

I only believe in me, unafraid of losing

understanding every bit of you

my heart is controlled by you

\remind me that the time to think of you is not enough

the normal things became prior

eventually you changed me

whether we are friends or lover

I just can't think hold of it

no matter how far in the universe we parted

I will be in that corner of the earth.

there you lay

tough is tough
boast is boast
strength is strength
enough is enough

there are limits in everything
eyes are blur with smokes
what you have, you must see
because you deserve to have a look

heart is what you hold
yes, you wanna be bold
tears you will get
if you don't go to bed

now peoples are flooding the pathways
love or hate is going to be
there you lay
leaving alone selfishly

冲动

your crazy heart

being happy is easy,
staying happy ain't easy.
smiling is easy,
but laughing ain't breezy.

saying it is easy,
but doing is tough.
making smiles are easy,
but to please is tough.

I am lazy
to carry my heart
I am too busy
to be a retard

you can make me dizzy
you can tear me apart
if only I am crazy
to listen to your crazy heart

Scarf buddy

I like my Scarf.. love the colors and the pattern and it is very useful especially when I am in my office, I need it so badly.  My new companion while I'm working.. ^o^

Summer text to Winter

At the end of the day
What sort of bugs me
Are the moments that I miss,
Talkin to you.

Day by day goes by,
thinking about,
the things that are meant to be,
Or are not meant to be.

Was it the timing,
Or the ties we had,
All that matters,
Are the times we shared.




Thank you for the poem. Though making a poem is not your best, but that was sweet of you  to make a reply to mine. :)

away in winter

crying so loud like the thunder
tears flood my room like the river
curiosity makes me wonder
waiting is really damn suffer

a message from you make my day brighter
Don know why make me feel better
is it because you are better than the others
or is it because we are not lover

I guess you have the tenderness
that keeps people soft and warm in winter
which there's no other like you 
that's why I have your number


Dedicate this to you who is in Birmingham, United Kingdom.

Trap in a frame

I don know my brain
I like you ain't 
you can call me insane
but I just like jumping in the rain


people are all the same
they come and go by train
they think that you are lame
that's not the worst I became


you are not my aim
nothing like what it would contain
no point for me to claim
forever I say the same




There are no fame
nothing to be proclaim
don't play it like a game
because it's worst than shame

“其实，你太让我动心了，对我太好了“

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMjE3MjAzMzc2.html

我多希望能被疼爱到这样的感觉， 不是因为我从来没得到过，而是我要的是象那女孩子一样，那男友明白她的性格。当她骂的时候，不代表她在骂，而是说不出的感觉。 当她在办cool 的时候，其实是忍不住地想哭。当她麻木了，不知道有这么做，她希望你能温柔的教她。 当她觉得你太让她感动， 她自然而然会把她的最脆弱的一目给你看到， 告诉你“其实，你太让我动心了，对我太好了“。

如果男人真的明白这一小部分，而可以明白这一小部分，我心满意足了。

Melted face

I born here and I have been raise here practically all my life and today when I went out with my mum as we are going for our lunch, the car is so HOT!! The heat.. is like going to explode any minute and I'm burning inside. especially my face!! oh no.. my face is burning!! Melting!! Discriminating by the sun!!

Oh my gosh... you know, it was so hot that I have to put the scarf over my face so that I will not get burn, making me look like one of the Malay people wearing head covering. But what to do? I had to protect my face, my face is like my life man~~~

Naming

Evian? Vivian? Devian?

My lovely friends ask me about my account name and such, wondering why is it Evian instead of Vivian.
From there, I have to expand my long long stories back in high school. Come to think of it, it's really an amazing moment that I have been through. Though my year not the best year or the best memories, but definite it cannot be bought with a price.

High school High school. It is all start with a madly crush. Can say that it is my first crush and that lasted for 5years. I do not know how is it possible that I could be so dreamy at that time when I first saw him, he could just take my breath away. Shockingly I can keep my feelings through out that five years and when I looked back, how silly I am, blinded by the images of him. At least I'm not insanely in love, or else I won't be here telling my past.

You must be wondering why is the name that I chose would have something to do with him right? That's because his name start with the letter E. He is my first crush, though it is over, and doesn't really matter now, but I just like to keep it in mind that he still exist, and exist in this world and not just my brain doing all those weird fantasies that simply make up a story.

Back then, I was shy to approach and not the type of girl that have the guts to do everything, afraid the rejection and stupidity upon me. So, being alert and stay calm while he is around is the what I did.
Oh, I remember I even gave him a nickname. "Babyface" short form "BF". Because he have a very cute charming face and I know, it might stands for the word Boyfriend, which I didn't realize it till one time I said it out loud, and then I try to figure whether there are other meaning that stands for this word, and yet it does, so I hope that it won't give him any bad impression on me. ooopsy... cause I said in front of him while he pass by me as my friend shouting. SO EMBARRASSING!!!

So, that's why it is call "Evian", somehow it stand for me, represented me, about my past, and also so on to the future.